nodding & smiling

ceci n'est pas un bébé lala


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Allies

So blurry but taken by a kid! My friends & I. We met at our kids' ringette games!

So blurry but taken by a kid! My friends & I. We met at our kids’ ringette games!

One thing I’ve discovered over my 18+ years of parenting is that it’s important to have allies. Allies in the form of friends and family who “have your back”. Sometimes an ally comes in the form of your child’s friend’s parent, forming naturally by virtue of the amount of time you spend with the same people. Other times, you meet a parent who just seems like “your kind of person” and you make the effort to become their friend.

Even though a few of the kids’ friendships have waned a bit with their evolving interests and groups of friends, I’ve remained friends with certain parents. Other friendships I’ve also let wane, as some relationships are finite and have a beginning and an end. I’m okay with that.

Allies when parenting are amazing. Being able to text your friend about the naughty thing her child and your child just did on their playdate at your house (come on – it was funny!), and know you’re both on the same page and “get it” is invaluable. Having someone you can call in a panic because you won’t be home in time to get your kid after school is also comforting (yes this has happened to me). And car-pooling? Don’t even get me started. With all the driving around we do, it’s nice to have someone to take turns with, or someone cool to share a drive with.

Allies. Get some!

 

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Friends

Best friends are the people in your life that make you laugh louder, smile brighter and live better. - Unknown.

Best friends are the people in your life that make you laugh louder, smile brighter and live better. – Unknown.

This Friday marked my elder daughter’s prom. Although not how she had been dreaming it would play out (thanks to the recent break-up of her 3.5-year relationship), she enjoyed a lovely pre-prom event that even welcomed parents (thanks, Ally!), her official school banquet and then a kickass pool party at a friend’s house till the wee hours. She’s a lucky girl to have such a great group of friends with whom to celebrate the end of high school, all their hard work and achievements, and years spent together.

Now, just a few days left of exams and their high school careers will be over. They’ll soon scatter around the country for the next phase of their young lives.

I was recently speaking with a good friend whose son is going into second-year university in the fall, and she said that university doesn’t represent the end of you “parenting” your (adult) child, because they will continue have plenty to learn from you, and will miss you, too. That’s comforting, but I’m still a bit misty. That said, I’m so excited to find out what all these kids will go forward and do.